I've lost track of time. Unbeknownst to me, I've been a prisoner for awhile now. It wasn't until I realized that every night's dream is an abysmal nightmare, and waking up to a reality that is worst. This penitentiary is polluting me.
The lights out. Unhappiness is corroding my insides and I feel every bit of it. Monstrous waves crashing against these cliffs in a violent storm, each time taking a piece into the ocean. I crawl on my hands and knees towards the center of the little land I have left as part of my shore gets washed away. Trying to stay safe as long as I possibly can. Not wanting to be swallow by the monstrosity, but not knowing what I am waiting for.
I've been lamenting and brooding in this sea of negative thoughts. On my darkest days, I close my eyes as hard as I can hoping that I can feel a shadow gently casting over my eyelids. A sign of hope that there is light nearby. I try and try but I every time I slowly open my eyes it's still total darkness. No matter how hard I try to pretend, I can't escape the reality of it. I try to fool myself with mind tricks and pretend that sadness doesn't exist.
I lost the alluring amalgamation of lenses that I once saw life in. My life was once clear now it's clearly out of focus.